I'm BACK - I keep being drawn back to Raw..

I am coming back to raw starting today.  In the past I've done it several times thru the summer.. one time for over 3 months.  I always try to make it too hard.  I titled this Blog "High Raw" because I wanted to not put so much pressure on myself to strive for that 100% because it just feeds my "all or nothing" mentality and has been my "Raw Downfall" in the past...

Here I am this AM.. so much has happened in the last couple of months.  My health is declining.. my body aches.  My back is so unhappy with me at this high weight (234 pounds this AM).  My feet hurt.. my hips are frighteningly sore, always. 

I know I keep being drawn back for a reason.  Today I am starting back.
I will not strive for any number of percentage.. right now I am just promising to eat much more raw fruits and veggies and much less processed crap.  I am ordering some good quality truly raw nuts (from Natural Zing) because I know they help me in the beginning.  I will make some dehydrated crackers too.

I am having problems with my throat.. it's constantly sore and inflamed.    I was Dx a couple of years ago with a hiatal hernia and know it was brought on by binge eating in my past.  I have issues with it still from time to time (binge eating) and just yesterday got back from a cruise with my hubs and way over ate.. every day.. several times a day.. I feel pain in my throat and upper chest and have bad heart burn..

I am going to go several hours today without eating a thing to just give myself a rest.. then I am having raw fruit for a late lunch and raw veggies for dinner..

I am sad.. and scared and so tired of being fat and unhealthy.  I am turning 50 this year.. in December.  I want to give myself a wonderful gift of health.. and weight loss.